Married 'Single' Mum

Have you heard of the term 'Married Single Mum'? Do you know anyone who is or you are one as well. I found out that I'm one when I was searching other people's experience dealing with husband working away. And yes, I'm a MSM. My husband has been away for 8 weeks now and we are missing him dearly. I have the responsibility of looking after our children. It is not easy as I have my limitation and I do need someone to share the job.

I think the hardest thing is I had relied heavily on Dane before this and I was lost without him.  When he was still here I could call/sms him whenever I need him during the day and he is never too far away. When the days got tough I would just look at the clock and knew that Dane would be home at 5:30pm. He would be here and give me a break. He could lend me his shoulder and give me a hug. 8 weeks I haven't seen him and so do the kids. It took me a few weeks to get the routine right and settled down the kids and myself. No more waiting for Dane to come home so I can cook dinner or go out to do some shopping. There's no other person to bath/shower the kids, to change them, or put them to bed. I have to do it all by myself. Even though I'm staying with my in-laws but they are both working full-time and they are very busy. Ultimately I'm the parent so I do it all. Also I better get used to it too because once we're posted to Newcastle, Adelaide or Darwin I will have no family or friends (hopefully to make some new friends) around. However, God is my strength and He is with me. Joshua 1:9 "Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go."

 

Even though Dane is not physically with us but he is still one of us. He is still the head of this house and we love him.  I think I'm still learning to find the balance and not to make my children feel that they only need mummy. Wisdom I really need it so much. Know how to involve Dane to still be part of our lives is the thing I have to put effort in. I started to talk about daddy and what daddy would do if he was here. I tried to talk  to Jono about the things that we do together with daddy. We wrote letters to daddy and we took photos so we can send it to him. No doubt there's time when Jono wanted to be with daddy and he was very sad that he couldn't go to training with daddy. However, he has been very stable and settled in the last few weeks. At the same time, I have become more independent and learnt to do many things by myself. Even though I know I could do it all but having Dane to share the load would be better. After all marriage is a two people's business. We also have built our family together and it's never complete without him. around. I really missed him last night when it was all quiet and I had no one to share my thoughts/feelings with. By that time we had not talk for 2 days. Thankfully we had about 10 minutes tonight on the phone. It 's so comforting to be able to hear his voice again.

I thank you Lord for giving me strength and comfort when things are tough. Thank you for your daily protection and provision. I can do nothing without you. When there's no one else around I know I have you. You have promised that You will never leave us nor forsake us. I prayed that my life reflects you and that my children will see how mummy's God is a living God. Help me to be an example to them and show them what being strong and courageous mean. Let them learn about how mummy and daddy trust in God and live their lives according to the Bible's Truth. Thank you for everything and I know I'm a happy and blessed 'Married Single Mum'.